We know, holiday bubbly and cheese is the oldest party pairing in the book. (Unofficially, that is.) But that doesn't mean it can't bring some deliciousness into your holiday season. In fact, the perfect wine and cheese plate has never been easier to create, as we've tapped some of the best experts across the country to help hook you up. First in line? Matthew Rubiner, the (highly opinionated) owner of Rubiner’s Cheesemongers & Grocers in Great Barrington, Massachusetts.
More ways to prepare for a holiday party :
- How to Buy and Serve Cheese
- 14 Chic Holiday Party Accessories You Didn't Know You Needed
- How to Get Holiday-Party Ready in 3 Minutes or Less
"Forget what you think you know. Cheese plates of the past involved 1) a waxy Brie, 2) a rubbery Havarti, and 3) something radioactively orange, like a cheddar or a Colby or a Co-Jack, which is a combination of Colby and Jack, and which everyone spoke of without a hint of irony, and which was blended together in a semi-industrial process, which I assume involved more than chopping it up into little pieces and smashing it with your hand—but that’s what it looked like." And, of course, follow these crucial tips.
1. Relax about the plate. Or whatever you call it. I say “cheese board.” (Sometimes I use the word “platter,” but I hate myself just a little every time I do.) A wooden—stone if you're pretentious— cutting board is great.
2. Pick artisanal cheeses that have traceability. It's simple: Farm and small-diary cheeses taste better than factory ones.
3. Your board/plate/platter should have a skyline. It needs contrasting and complementary shapes, textures, and flavors. A cow, a sheep—hell, why not—throw in a goat.
4. There need be no progression from mild to strong. ...unless your friends are incredibly geeky.
5. Many may counsel you to cut cheese into little pieces. Obviously, these people are not your friends.
6. I’m a baguette/country loaf guy. I typically cut it up in some way so guests don’t have to sweat it out. If you go with crackers, they shouldn’t have too much flavor—just olive oil, shouldn’t be edible cardboard either.
7. Serving cheese right out of the refrigerator is a rookie move. Make the plate in advance, drape a cloth over it, and give it at least an hour on the counter—every cheese in the world tastes better at room temperature.
8. Three to five cheeses is the sweet spot. Figure two ounces total per person.
Here’s what you’re buying:
- Instead of waxy Brie, try a Robiola or Moses Sleeper from Jasper Hill Creamery in Vermont.
- Instead of a weird orange, try a farmstead English cheddar, like Keen’s Cheddar, or an American clothbound cheddar, like Cabot Creamery Clothbound Cheddar.
- Instead of Havarti, try Asiago Fresco or Consider Bardwell Farm Pawlet. Instead of bleu, get a cheese that has an actual name: Stilton (from England), Gorgonzola (from Italy), Roquefort (from France), or American Bayley Hazen Blue or Great Hill Blue.
- Instead of Muenster, get an authentic monastic cheese, like Chimay or Tamié. Timberdoodle (which is a real name) from Woodcock Farm and Ameribella from Jacobs and Brichford are American versions made in a similar style.
And as for the booze you'll need for those holiday bubbly and cheese picks? First off, when inviting guests, "make sure you don't call it a wine tasting," says sommelier David Lynnch. "Great. Just please never call it that. If someone invited me to her house and wanted to have a wine seminar at a holiday party, I’d advise strongly against it. People don’t want to go to class—they want to enjoy themselves. Instead, put together a tasting that’s self-guided and actually fun. Go for sparkling wines from around the world—then you can let people compare and contrast within a fairly narrow category."
"They’ll get the fizzy, easygoing farmer-style wines as well as the fancy champagne. The only house rule: Everyone gets one glass. Break out your cool wine charms, get a grease pencil and write names on the feet of the glasses, or try any of the other ways magazines have told us to keep track of our glasses. What can I say? It’s a serious societal issue that needs to be addressed. Last thing: If you’re hosting 20 people, plan on at least three bottles of each wine. You do want people to have fun, right?"
Thankfully, Lynnch made it easy for us and gave us THE list of bottles to buy. BRB, heading to the liquor store now.
- Champagne (France): Pol Roger, Champagne Brut NV
- French non-Champagne (Loire Valley): Domaine des Baumard, Crémant de Loire Brut NV
- Cava (Spain): Raventós i Blanc Cava Conca del Riu Anoia Brut de la Finca 2012
- American sparkling: Schramsberg Vineyards North Coast Brut Blanc de Blancs 2013
- Franciacorta (Italy): Il Mosnel Franciacorta Brut NV
- Prosecco (Italy): Sorelle Bronca, Prosecco di Valdobbiadene Extra Dry NV (Italy)
- A SodaStream Fizzi. Bubbles come in all forms, after all.
Now, watch how to create holiday party makeup:
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