How To Give a Lap Dance

You don't have to be a professional dancer to pull off a sexy lap dance for a lucky someone — just follow these tips.

1. Check out videos for inspiration.

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Instagram and YouTube are home to countless videos of experts strutting their stuff.

(To start you off, dancer and trainer Keaira LaShae displays some serious moves here. You don't have to execute them all before you're ready to show your partner what you've got; adopt whichever shimmies, sways, and rolls feel good to you.)

2. Choose a song that puts you in a seductive head space.

Try Beyoncé's "Dance for You" — it doesn't get more straightforward than that. Or, if that's not your style, DJ Leigh Lezark of the Misshapes gave us a list of songs to play when your clothes are coming off. There's something for everyone here.

1. The Knife, "Heartbeats"
2. Rhye, "Open"
3. Frank Ocean, "Thinkin About You"
4. Portishead, "Glory Box"
5. Usher, "Climax"

3. Wear something that makes you feel confident.

Keep in mind that a two-piece outfit, for example a top with shorts or a miniskirt, gives you more options than a dress for stripping, if that's going to be part of your lap dance. (For example, you can playfully pull up your top as if you're going to take it off, then release it, or hook your thumbs in your shorts and slo-o-owly slide them down your hips while gyrating...you get the picture).

4. Sit your partner down on a couch or seat with armrests.

Either works: On a couch, you can straddle your seated partner with your knees on either side of them. Armrests, meanwhile, can act as handles for you to grip as you slide yourself up and down in front of your partner.

5. Circle your seated partner slowly and run your hands over them to heighten anticipation.

Walk slowly around your partner while brushing their head and shoulders before you begin. When you're in front of them again, run your hand from their head all the way down their thigh before increasing contact. (Feel free to establish and then enforce whatever touching rules you desire: Is your partner allowed to touch you while you dance? Where? Remember that the point here is to drive them a little wild.)

6. Sit on your partner's lap facing them as you make eye contact and move your hips in circles.

If you have breasts and they brush up against your partner, all the better.

7. Next, rise to a standing position in front of your partner (still facing them) and then gently slide one of your legs down their crotch.

With one leg on the ground, raise your other leg and brush your partner's crotch with it as you lower it back to the ground. Support yourself with your hands on armrests or your partner's knees.

8. Face away from your partner and lower yourself until your nearly sitting on their lap, then grind away.

You can support yourself with your hands on your knees, their knees, armrests, or even the back of the seat as you move your butt in circles, side to side, and up and down. Add whatever touches you like: Extend one hand back to caress their head, or press your torso against theirs and lean back to kiss their neck. And don't forget: If you lose your balance or otherwise "mess up," laugh and keep going! This is for fun, not a rating out of ten — besides, your partner may be so enthralled they don't even notice.

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